rest vs "R"est
A few weeks ago Michael and I looked at each other and said, “I know we’re busy…but why are we SO exhausted?” Then we chuckled to each other. Remembering that not only was he in the middle of finals at that time, leaving me solo with the girls a lot more often than usual, but we also just moved. To a place that requires a lot of schlepping. And not only moved, but moved across the country. With three small children. Oh, and we had a baby this year too. Cut to the two of us deliriously cracking up at the fact that we were wondering why in the world we were so tired!
I don’t say any of this to get any sort of sympathy or pat on the back. I say this to reflect, mostly for myself - as that is the main purpose of this blog after all - to reflect, to document this unique season of our lives. Coming to the end of 2021 was big for us. Not that we were ever ready for it to end, it just felt like a big exhale. So much has happened in our lives this year. Not even just logistically, but emotionally too. Carrying so much emotion as we geared up to move here, carrying so much emotion as we have settled into life here. Carrying so much emotion as we parent and navigate the demands of law school on all of us and find energy and space to walk through all the in-betweens as best as we can.
We are two weeks into Michael’s four week break and I don’t think either of us have needed rest more in our lives. Not even just physical rest, but the rest that’s found in family time that’s unscheduled, exploring the city, getting outside, experiencing the holidays here together for the first time. We’ve been experiencing rest in so many different ways these past couple of weeks and have found space to exhale, regroup, play (and of course sleep in and lay around in our sweatpants all day, too). Praise be to God.
Michael and I have talked a lot about rest these past couple of weeks, especially as we’re a little ways into this break and have found ourselves starting to feel aimless and restless in the lack of routine we have (funny how quickly this happens, huh?). Michael has always referred to true rest as capital R “Rest” - intentional, God-present rest. Rest WITH God, allowing Him to be part of your rest, rather than just zoning out or numbing out in some way. Intentionally and mindfully bringing Him into your rest.
We enter this upcoming year as a family with so much hope, expectation, gratitude. We are thankful that we’ve had a continued sense of “this is exactly where we’re supposed to be” that we carry into this new year. We feel a deep sense of appreciation for this city we are blessed to be able to call home. We feel grateful for this unique opportunity as a family, for the ways it has already shaped us all, the way we parent, the way we see the world and those around us.
Here’s to praying for more contentment in the day to day, cooking more, being on my phone less, prioritizing waking up before my kids (as much as possible, at least), trying to get outside every day. Here’s to praying continually for a quiet mind, a quiet spirit. Here’s to more capital R “Rest.”