Q&A Part One (Nov. 11, 2021)

hi friends, it's me - actually writing on my blog (!). it has been a minute (insert sweaty emoji). October was insanely busy for us and it felt nearly impossible to find time (or energy let's be honest) to write. but here we are! I'm finally getting around to answering some of the questions you guys sent my way via instagram approximately one million years ago. :)

I decided to break this into two parts - one being more "personal" and the other being more focused on apartment/product-specific questions, things like that. also, thank you to everyone who asked questions - it's truly been so much fun to get to connect with so many wonderful new people!

How’s adjusting to NYC?

I would say overall, the adjustment has been quite smooth! We’ve known we were moving here since November 2020, so when we finally made it here it felt like a huge sigh of relief - took a lot of mental energy knowing we were moving to a new place for so long and felt so good to finally start settling in somewhere instead of being on our way out. Living here definitely comes with unique challenges - some things are so much easier and take such little effort, like being able to get to so many cool things so quickly. I’m still adjusting to the other side of that coin a bit - as it takes so much more effort to do things like get everyone out the door by myself (getting three kids ready to go + managing getting the stroller, bag, scooter, whatever else we have + the kiddos down the stairs of our building, down the stoop stairs to the sidewalk, and down the subway stairs takes about all of my energy, haha). The city is so inspiring and wonderful but also very stimulating on some days (which on top of the stimulation that comes with having little ones can be a lot at times), so depending on the day I feel energized by it all or like I want to lay in my bed with all the lights off in complete silence - ha! Everywhere has its own unique challenges and we’ve tried to be really proactive about not comparing the more challenging things about NYC to the things that were easier in Sacramento/other places in general. Overall, we really really love it and are having so much fun. 

What’s a typical day like for you and your family?

We’re still trying to find our groove here week to week, figuring out the best structure for our days - it’s been a process! Continually learning in new ways that structure is tough with little ones and trying to take each day in stride. That being said, we’ve found some rhythms that work well for us so far. Lennon takes ballet class on Monday afternoons, so I usually spend Monday mornings getting ready for the week - ordering groceries, cleaning, laundry, meal prep, etc. Most days, we spend the mornings at home while James takes her morning nap, then do our best to get out and do something when she wakes up. We go to the playground across the street/Central Park when we just need fresh air and not too-stressful of an outing. I try to go on an “adventure” with the kids at least once a week (a long walk further south through Central Park, window shopping in SoHo, a trip to the museum, visiting Michael at NYU + playing in Washington Square Park), and try to meet up with friends for a playdate once or twice per week. We eat dinner at home together every night as a family, as 5:30pm - 7pm is just about all the free time Michael has away from school responsibilities. Friday nights are reserved for chicken nugget dinners for the kids and post-bedtime takeout for Michael and me to turn our phones off, catch up and spend some time together. Saturdays are slow and reserved for exploring as a family, and Sundays are spent in West Village (our church is there, so we usually go early and get coffee/stroll through the Village, sometimes grab a slice of pizza afterward and eat lunch in the park). 

Did you get rid of a ton of stuff when you moved from Sac to NYC?

A toooonnnnn. It was so refreshing! We sold majority of our stuff except for the big things like our couch, the girls’ beds/toys, things like that. We lived in a three bedroom house in Sacramento and knew that downsizing/starting over would be the best way to make the most of 600 sq ft, rather than trying to force the things we already had in and hope they worked. I will say, I love purging and had sooo much fun doing this.

What’s your professional background?

I majored in Elementary Education (started as a Social Work major, ended up switching after my freshman year). I taught first grade for one year after graduating, realized it just wasn’t for me, and made the switch to a job working for a for-profit ministry doing account management. I did that for a year, then took on the role of Director of Children’s Ministry at the church we went to in Austin, TX. Right after I started that job (literally two days after) I found out I was pregnant with Lennon, and stayed home with her once she was born. I’ve stayed home full-time with the girls ever since. 

Is NYC as financially stressful as you anticipated?

I’d say yes and no on this one. On one hand there are so many fun things to do (and good restaurants + coffee shops) that it’s hard to have to say no to doing it all due to financial constraints. On the other hand, there are so many incredible things to do that are available for free or very cheap — like visiting the Met or the Museum of Natural History and paying what you wish (perks of being an NYC resident!).  Plus, things like not having a car save us money too, so we’ve found that it evens out for the most part.

Are you religious?

I’ve been a Christian all my life - was raised in a Christian home/in church - but would say that I didn’t fully commit my life to Christ until I was in college. He met me in some really deep valleys in that season of my life and my need for Him became painfully real, which I now couldn’t be more grateful for. He is the center of who I am, my entire life, and I pray that He will continue to sustain and grow my faith in Him as I walk very (very) imperfectly through each day.

Tips for juggling being a SAHM and finding time for yourself and your relationship?

Gosh, this one is ever-evolving, so if you have tips for me I’d gladly take them! haha. So far, I’ve found that balance doesn’t seem to exist — something always has to give, at least a little bit. I find that I’m always checking in with myself to see what feels like needs more of my attention at any given time. The priority list is always shifting and changing for me — my family is always my number one priority no matter what — but I do feel that the juggle doesn’t necessarily stop. I just do my best to make the best decisions I can each day, knowing that I’m only one person and every cup can’t be filled at the same time. I do trust God with this - I know He fills in the gaps where I fall short in relationships due to the fact that I just don’t have enough to give everyone/everything all that I wish I could all the time (myself included - self-care, rest, all the things). He completes the work that I can't.

So I guess all this to say, I suppose a “tip” would be to just constantly check in. What’s something I’ve been focusing on a lot lately? What has taken a bit of a “backseat?” Does it still feel right to be giving this amount of attention to this thing/relationship/time for myself, or does my focus/attention need to shift a bit?"